Days 14-15: Brain the Terrible Becomes Bi-Polar (Gümüshane)

I don’t know what it is about this place but I feel like it’s making me bi-polar. One minute, I’m happy as a clam and the next I’m ready to throw a chair through the window and try to break out of Turkey. It even affects my mood in class! I’ll be praising a student and then I hear someone talking over me and I start yelling at him/her like a mental patient.

Despite my mood swings, some of my beginner students continue to refuse to do their assignments or turn in their homework. I have one student who hasn’t done a single homework assignment since the first day of class. You’d think he’d just quit coming. Others just get up and walk around while I’m talking or writing something on the board. Some have to be asked individually to copy down what’s on the board – a blanket “Please copy down what’s written on the board” just isn’t good enough for them. Today I had to throw a student out of my class because he was just sitting there staring at me the whole time. Apparently he found that a better use of his time than doing the assignment. Others were forced to stay behind after class to finish the assignment.

Advanced beginner is becoming a favorite of mine. The class is all girls except for one very smart boy that always finishes his work ahead of everyone else. They all participate. They all turn in their homework. They’re all actively engaged in learning.

Today in the intermediate/advanced class we had two new students and both of them speak considerably more English than the other students. One of them is a wealthy girl who attends a private school where there must be an American teacher because she has an almost perfect American accent and an exceptional command of English. We had a debate today about whether or not Israel should apologize to Turkey over the Blue Marmara incident; she so quickly dominated the debate that the rest of her team refused to speak out of embarrassment. Later one of them said to me, “I heard her and I just shut up! Why should I even try to talk in English in front of her?” Hopefully they’ll adjust to her, otherwise I don’t know what I’m going to do.

Yesterday I spent more time than usual with the students. I got schooled in chess three different times. I mean, not just schooled – I was crushed, destroyed. By 13 year olds. They seemed to get a kick out of it, though, so I don’t mind too much. And today our afternoon activity was trying to give me heat stroke. But actually we walked together to one of the local museums. It displays the traditional style of housing in this region, which is actually very nice, and it has a number of artifacts inside. This weekend we’ll be traveling to two sets of ruins, which I’m pretty excited about!

In the absence of much else to write, I’ll give you a glimpse of what my students turn in for their homework. The first one is sentence writing practice and the rest are from a writing assignment that asked, “If you had unlimited money but you knew you would die in 3 days, what would you do?”. Enjoy!

“World War II happened between 1919 and 1969.” (In Turkish history books, WW2 got off the ground a little early and it took us slightly longer to deal with Hitler. =P)

“Another thing that I want to do is find my ex-girlfriend (it’s first) and I want to apologize to her for the old days.” (I said “Aww” to this until he started hitting on my co-teacher. He got over that other girl awfully fast.)

“I would buy Hollywood. I would build the most beautiful grave for myself. I would buy an F-16 and drive all over the world.” (Beware of someone driving an F-16 around Hollywood.)

“I would donate $100 billion to UNICEF. I would help African people. I would try to make the world a better place.” (This one is clearly trying to suck up to me.)

“I would go to America. I would buy the Los Angeles Lakers basketball team. I would meet Obama. I would play basketball in Staples Center. I would get married to Beyonce. I would buy two thousand BMWs. Last day, I throw myself from an airplane.” (This sounds like an excellent plan!)

“I would meet my favorite football player and I would go shopping. I would buy all of the clothes.” (This is from the only girl in the class.)

“I would save myself from this illness. I would develop technology. I would buy a TV channel. I would say ‘bye bye’ to all the people on TV. I would buy all the factories. Last day I would drink sleep medicines. I would sleep. I would not feel the death.” (This guy puts all his money into factories. And I would not want to feel the death either. Good thinking!)